Today I expose myself

I think being honest about your weaknesses is 100% the key to turning those weaknesses into strengths

If you are honest with the people in you life about what you want to achieve

What you are trying to do

Those people will help you in your quest

The most liberating thing I did this year was to reveal to my boyfriend that I used food as an emotional crutch

And when I am stressed or sad or angry or anxious I stuff my face to quash those emotions down

I have done this for years

Well I USED to do this

I have talked about this a little before

My earliest memory of doing this is at the age of 10

It IS an eating disorder

It WAS my problem

I have done a lot of things in the last year to change my circumstances

I realised that I was jeopardizing my health for one thing

It wasn't cool

So I put things in place to stop

Can I say with 100% certainty that it will never happen again

No actually

I spent 24 years of my life depending on this to help me through my hard times

Do I think one year of being rehabilitated will fix me, of course not

I need to work hard every day to ensure that I don't put myself into the situations that are my triggers

I've worked on myself every day to change my mindset

This is where I believe we fall short as a society

If something has taken your entire lifetime to will not be fixed in 5 days

You cannot fix a lifetime of yo yo dieting with a 5 day juice detox

You can't fix a lifetime of emotional dependency on food with 6 months of being 'good'

I talked the other day about the temptations that are out there in your daily life

Treats on every corner

How easy is it to have a bad day and inhale a family size bag of maltesers!!

It's far too easy

Its not easy to peel back your layers and expose yourself and admit that you have/had a problem

And it might linger around for some time

Telling Elliot about this was so liberating for me

It meant that the person whose respect I most craved, knew all of my layers

And he didn't think any less of me for it

He actually takes the piss out of me for it, he's a real wind up merchant

He knocks food off my fork - even when we eat out in restaurants!

He eats food from my plate....piglet!

But that's what I needed actually

I needed someone to change how I felt about it and see it for what it was

And most importantly that I have other sources of support to use rather than mainlining sugar!

So lay yourself bare

If you have the right people in your life, they will respect you for your honesty

And they will try to help you

Even if they just act as a break in the cycle

Be honest with yourself

Nicola 'no more pinoccio' Rossell

Click Here To Find out How To Get Your Confidence Back